What is Wife Assault?
The law defines "assault" as the intentional use of force againast another person without their consent.
For an abused woman, there is always much more involved than what the legal definition suggests that being abused is.
Being abused always involves more than just physical assault. It can also include emotional (verbal) abuse, psychological abuse and sexual abuse.
Emotional Abuse
Any form of abuse also includes an element of emotional or 'verbal' abuse.
This involves constant belittling of the woman and is intended to make her feel degraded. When a woman feels degraded, she is likely to see herself as deserving of abuse and soon finds it difficult to take steps to protect herself.
Psychological Abuse
Assualtive husbands or boyfriends often try to control their wives' behaviour by inducing fear. It is common for threats of violence against their wives' to be paired with the destruction of things which belong to her and even injuring family pets.
Sexual Abuse
Sexual abuse can involve forced intercourse after a beating. the woman is forced to participate in undesired sexual acts and usually experience pain during intercourse.
Why do women stay in verbally or physically abusive relationships?
Often, most verbally or physically abused women stay because they want their marriages to work and they hope their husbands will change. They may believe it their fault and will try harder to be a "good wife" or girlfriend.
Frequently, women think their husbands are "ill" and try to nurse them back to good health by giving them more love and understanding.
When this doesnt work, they realize they cannot handle the situation by themselves and may turn to others for help without success.
Many agencies and legal organizations are unprepared and unable to provide meaniingful assistance to women who have been beaten by their husbands or boyfriends.
Potential financial hardships, limited job opportunities, inadequate housing and daycare and all the difficulties of being a single parent become real concerns.
Women who have immigrated from another country to be with their partner can also find themselves in a bind. This usually occurs when they are legally married in the country for which their husbands hold citizenship.
Leaving an abusive relationship can be a risky situation. Abused women are often too scared to leave for fear that their partner will try to kill them or hurt their children or families.
Do women provoke attacks?
The word "provoke" implies that there are some behaviours that justify assault.
Women in abusive relationships report a widespread range of actions that can trigger and assualt.
These include:
- visiting family or friends without permission
- preparing a meal for him the worng way
- not cleaning the house properly
- speaking without permission
- disagreeing with him
- and so on...
When a man says "she provoked me", he is essentially placing the blame on his wife in an attempt to escape responsibility for his actions.
There is NO excuse for verbal or physical assault!
Provocation only exists in the mind of the provoked.
